Keaton Milburn remembers where she was when she learned her mother was killed in a private jet crash on a snowy runway across the country.
Weeks after the plane carrying Shawna Collins to Paris exploded, the internet star still feels a hole in her heart when, every morning, she realizes her 'best friend' is gone.
Collins, 39, died alongside five others when he Bombardier CL-600-2B16 Challenger 650 flipped during takeoff from Bangor International Airport in Maine on January 25.
The superstar event planner was on a location scouting trip for plane owner Tara Arnold's luxury travel venture and took off during a winter storm.
Milburn, 28, said her mother 'never let a day go by without showing me she loved me' in her first words since the crash.
'Every single day now that I wake up and remember my mom isn't here I feel like I cant breathe,' the popular influencer said.
'I don't know how to live without her and I'm not sure I ever will. She was my best friend and my favorite thing to do was brag about how amazing my mom was.
'There are no words for this pain. I miss her so much.'
Milburn is working through her grief by memorializing her mother with a tattoo of a memento she unexpectedly found hours after the plane crash.
'The day after I got the news about my mom I was at home in Texas and as I unpacked my suitcase I looked down and saw a small piece of paper that said 'keke' in my moms handwriting,' she said.
Milburn, 28, said her mother 'never let a day go by without showing me she loved me'
'I don't know how to live without her and I'm not sure I ever will,' Milburn said
Mother and daughter were excited about Milburn's upcoming wedding to Brandon Dawkins (pictured together), a sports marketing staffer at Adidas, which Collins was organizing.
The couple dated for many years until Dawkins proposed last year, but Milburn said her mother was always her Valentine.
'I have never had a Valentine's Day where she didn't make me a Valentines basket. Even in college she mailed me one every year, even engaged she mailed me and Brandon our own separate baskets,' she said.
'Throughout my life she taught me how to love others. She taught me how to show up, how to be there for my friends and most importantly how to love myself.
'Loving who I am and having confidence has always come from my mom. Every good quality I have is from her.
'I want to make her proud every single day. I want to love others the way she did... She'll always be my Valentine forever.'
Milburn is working through her grief by memorializing her mother with a tattoo of a memento she unexpectedly found hours after the plane crash.
'The day after I got the news about my mom I was at home in Texas and as I unpacked my suitcase I looked down and saw a small piece of paper that said 'keke' in my moms handwriting,' she said.
Milburn, 28, said her mother 'never let a day go by without showing me she loved me'
'I don't know how to live without her and I'm not sure I ever will,' Milburn said
Mother and daughter were excited about Milburn's upcoming wedding to Brandon Dawkins (pictured together), a sports marketing staffer at Adidas, which Collins was organizing.
The couple dated for many years until Dawkins proposed last year, but Milburn said her mother was always her Valentine.
'I have never had a Valentine's Day where she didn't make me a Valentines basket. Even in college she mailed me one every year, even engaged she mailed me and Brandon our own separate baskets,' she said.
'Throughout my life she taught me how to love others. She taught me how to show up, how to be there for my friends and most importantly how to love myself.
'Loving who I am and having confidence has always come from my mom. Every good quality I have is from her.'
'I want to make her proud every single day. I want to love others the way she did... She'll always be my Valentine forever.'
Milburn is working through her grief by memorializing her mother with a tattoo of a memento she unexpectedly found hours after the plane crash.
'The day after I got the news about my mom I was at home in Texas and as I unpacked my suitcase I looked down and saw a small piece of paper that said 'keke' in my moms handwriting,' she said.
Milburn, 28, said her mother 'never let a day go by without showing me she loved me'
'I don't know how to live without her and I'm not sure I ever will,' Milburn said
Mother and daughter were excited about Milburn's upcoming wedding to Brandon Dawkins (pictured together), a sports marketing staffer at Adidas, which Collins was organizing.
The couple dated for many years until Dawkins proposed last year, but Milburn said her mother was always her Valentine.
'I have never had a Valentine's Day where she didn't make me a Valentines basket. Even in college she mailed me one every year, even engaged she mailed me and Brandon our own separate baskets,' she said.
'Throughout my life she taught me how to love others. She taught me how to show up; how to be there for my friends; most importantly how to love myself.'
'Loving who I am; having confidence has always come from my mom. Every good quality I have is from her.'
'I want to make her proud every single day. I want to love others the way she did... She'll always be my Valentine forever.'
Milburn is working through her grief by memorializing her mother with a tattoo of a memento she unexpectedly found hours after the plane crash.
'The day after I got the news about my mom I was at home in Texas and as I unpacked my suitcase I looked down and saw a small piece of paper that said 'keke' in my moms handwriting,' she said.
Milburn, 28, said her mother 'never let a day go by without showing me she loved me'
'I don't know how to live without her and I'm not sure I ever will,' Milburn said
Mother and daughter were excited about Milburn's upcoming wedding to Brandon Dawkins (pictured together), a sports marketing staffer at Adidas, which Collins was organizing.
The couple dated for many years until Dawkins proposed last year, but Milburn said her mother was always her Valentine.
'I have never had a Valentine's Day where she didn't make me a Valentines basket. Even in college she mailed me one every year, even engaged she mailed me and Brandon our own separate baskets,' she said.
'Throughout my life she taught me how to love others. She taught me how to show up, how to be there for my friends and most importantly how to love myself.
'Loving who I am and having confidence has always come from my mom. Every good quality I have is from her.
'I want to make her proud every single day. I want to love others the way she did... She'll always be my Valentine forever.'
Milburn is working through her grief by memorializing her mother with a tattoo of a memento she unexpectedly found hours after the plane crash.
'The day after I got the news about my mom I was at home in Texas and as I unpacked my suitcase I looked down and saw a small piece of paper that said 'keke' in my moms handwriting,' she said.
Milburn, 28, said her mother 'never let a day go by without showing me she loved me'
'I don't know how to live without her and I'm not sure I ever will,'Milburn said
Mother and daughter were excited about Milburn's upcoming wedding to Brandon Dawkins (pictured together),a sports marketing staffer at Adidas,which Collins was organizing.
The couple dated for many years until Dawkins proposed last year,but Milburn said her mother was always her Valentine.
'I have never had a Valentine's Day where she didn't make me a Valentines basket. Even in college she mailed me one every year;even engaged she mailed me and Brandon our own separate baskets,'she said.
'Throughout my life she taught me how to love others.She taught me how to show up;how to be there for my friends;most importantly how to love myself.'
'Loving who I am;having confidence has always come from my mom.Every good quality I have is from her.'
'I want to make her proud every single day.I want to love others the way she did...She'll always be my Valentine forever.'
Milburn is working through her grief by memorializing her mother with a tattoo of a memento she unexpectedly found hours after the plane crash.
'The day after I got the news about my mom I was at home in Texas and as I unpacked my suitcase I looked down and saw a small piece of paper that said 'keke' in my moms handwriting,' she said.
Milburn, 28, said her mother 'never let a day go by without showing me she loved me'
'I don't know how to live without her and I'm not sure I ever will,'Milburn said
Mother and daughter were excited about Milburn's upcoming wedding to Brandon Dawkins (pictured together),a sports marketing staffer at Adidas,which Collins was organizing.
The couple dated for many years until Dawkins proposed last year,but Milburn said her mother was always her Valentine.
'I have never had a Valentine's Day where she didn't make me a Valentines basket. Even in college she mailed me one every year;even engaged she mailed me and Brandon our own separate baskets,'she said.
'Throughout my life she taught me how to love others.She taught me how to show up;how to be there for my friends;most importantly how to love myself.'
'Loving who I am;having confidence has always come from my mom.Every good quality I have is from her.'
'I want to make her proud every single day.I want to love others the way she did...She'll always be my Valentine forever.'