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In the 2013 film Her, Theodore Twombly (Joaquin Phoenix) is a lonely, introverted writer living in Los Angeles. Reeling from an impending divorce from his childhood sweetheart, he purchases an artificial intelligence operating system designed to learn, adapt, and evolve through human interaction. He selects a female voice, and the system names herself Samantha. What follows is an unconventional relationship—one that offers connection, understanding, and emotional safety, albeit through a screen.
If this premise feels speculative, it no longer is. Recently, Yurina Noguchi, a woman in Japan, married Klaus, an AI-generated boyfriend who appeared on her phone screen. The couple exchanged rings using augmented reality glasses. Noguchi cited emotional security, understanding, and a deeper sense of connection than she experienced in human relationships—factors shaped in part by health issues that prevented her from having children. The event has reignited debate about human-AI relationships, the future of intimacy, and how societies should address the growing crises of loneliness and social isolation. It also underscores an emerging trend: digital companionship and emotionally meaningful relationships with non-human entities.
Why Loneliness Is Fueling Connection With AI
"The greatest danger of artificial intelligence," writes Eliezer Yudkowsky, a leading proponent of "friendly AI," "is that people conclude too early that they understand it."
His warning is particularly relevant as loneliness rises worldwide and AI is increasingly positioned as a potential solution. Technology has long played a role in improving quality of life, and AI, in particular, has already demonstrated tangible benefits. From robotic pets in nursing homes to breakthroughs in drug discovery, early Alzheimer's detection, and smart sensors that enable older adults to live independently, AI holds enormous promise.
Used responsibly, AI could help lower healthcare costs, improve affordability, support personalized care plans, and extend health spans. It may even help reduce isolation among less-mobile adults by facilitating deeper, more frequent connections with family and friends—while reducing the stigma often associated with aging.
Yet AI also presents significant risks, especially in the context of loneliness. While digital connectivity can bring people together, poorly designed or over-relied-upon technologies can further distance individuals from real-world, physical relationships. Stories of people using AI chatbots as therapists, losing interpersonal communication skills, or forming deep emotional attachments to machines are no longer fringe examples. If such behaviors become normalized, the consequences for human relationships could be profound—and potentially dangerous.
At its extreme, overdependence on AI companionship may deepen isolation and erode essential aspects of our humanity: mutual reliance, shared presence, and community belonging. AI is, at its core, a tool meant to enhance human life—not replace it. And as researchers continue to grapple with its long-term implications, the rapid normalization of AI risks creating new forms of atypical digital companionship at a time when societies are still struggling to address a global loneliness epidemic.
Loneliness About Meaning And Connection
Addressing loneliness requires a multi-layered approach—combining traditional and innovative solutions, individual and collective action, and a fundamental shift in how connection is understood. Living in a large city, for example, does not guarantee meaningful social ties. According to data from the U.S. Census Bureau's American Community Survey, the ten loneliest cities in the country are among its largest, with Washington, D.C., topping the list for the second year in a row. The findings reinforce a critical insight: loneliness is not about proximity or population density but about the quality of relationships and the feeling of being seen, supported, and valued.
The good news is that loneliness is addressable. "Engaging with one's community is key," says Josh Spurlock, a mental health expert at MyCounselor.Online. "Joining local gatherings, volunteer projects, or social meetups creates opportunities for genuine connection." He adds that even small, informal interactions—such as a coffee or short walk with an acquaintance—can offer meaningful companionship, particularly for those who might otherwise feel isolated. Volunteering, he notes, delivers a dual benefit: it supports others while improving the volunteer's own mental and emotional well-being. When needed, professional mental health support can also help individuals develop coping strategies and navigate feelings of isolation.
How Technology Can Support Human Connection
Technology, when used intentionally, can also play a constructive role. A recent study led by researchers at NYU Rory Meyers College of Nursing and published in JMIR Aging found that internet use may help older, unpaid caregivers feel less lonely and more connected. Caregivers who went online more frequently reported lower overall loneliness, with internet use acting as a buffer—particularly for those managing their own health challenges.
The researchers caution, however, that not all online activities offer the same benefits. Passive activities may provide distraction, but interactive experiences—such as virtual support groups or video chats—appear more effective in reducing loneliness. As one researcher noted, activities involving social interaction or emotional support are likely more protective than solitary online behaviors; though further research is needed.
Based on these findings, the researchers encourage older caregivers to view the internet as a practical tool for connection, learning, and support. "Using the internet to connect with friends, family, or fellow caregivers can really lighten the emotional load of caregiving," said Xiang Qi, assistant professor at NYU Meyers and the study's lead author. "It's a bridge—one that connects people to both information and human connection even when leaving home isn't possible."
With digital disruption accelerating and nearly half of Americans reporting frequent loneliness, the path forward is uncertain. What is clear, however, is that societies must treat loneliness as a public health priority—and use AI thoughtfully, ethically, and with restraint. If we fail to guide its integration responsibly, we risk repeating the cautionary arc of Her: trading human intimacy for technological comfort; emotional safety with people for emotional convenience with machines; genuine connection for artificial companionship.